Pedma

you want to make it in that one cycle, punt, gamble, because subconsciously you know that, even if you don't want to admit, you probably can't make it if you tried to.
or you are afraid of that ineptitude to be revealed if you actually tried.

shopping for cars but attaching how much PnL could be made for that price.

producing so much you don't really have time to think deeply about stuff you're producing. I think there needs to be made time for both, especially in what we do. time to think about all the tradeoffs, risks, edge cases, and time to execute and build.

this last year I got to experience the biggest reinforcement of the idea to fafo and stop worrying and overthinking so much. figure it out on the job. just do the thing. ignore the noise from those that just comment from the sidelines. just do it.
cliche yeh I know but still...

doing 2025-eoy personal accounting. at least won't ever be able to say I didn't give it my all. a bit of a degen year on the risk side.
net worth at peak, but all of it in business+trading accounts. looking forward to de-risk eventually, but for now, the grind continues.

good friends & family make your life much more enjoyable.
money is great, and making it your responsibility to provide gives you meaning.
but at the end of the day, money ain't the goal, or shouldn't.
people you care about being taken care of, that's the goal.
happy sunday.

have a fun filled afternoon taking care of long over due backoffice stuff. dread that so much but gotta sink at least a day or so every month on that. this time will try to automate it with AI as much as I can though.

have a fun filled afternoon taking care of long over due backoffice stuff. dread that so much but gotta sink at least a day or so every month on that. hope that to be soon automated by AI.

that 2-second heart tug you feel when api's are glitching and your wallet balances show $0.22

can't really say enough about the drastic positive effect of each day, even if just for an hour, leaving the house, lifting heavy stuff and getting some sun exposure.
been stuck too much at home lately coding. this summer I want to say I'll probably just chill more but tbh probably have to much on my hands to do that.
can't really pass the opportunity that is presented right now. there will be time to chill. some years you just gotta push.
but at least that short period of time, every day, doing exercise and getting some sun is super important to help with mood.
the positive side of being in P

you can just generate very detailed logs for anything without wasting time. I think this is a tool that will serve a lot in the future. I am basically logging every detail of code changes, strategy development, research findings, all dumped into a vault separated by context.

whenever I'm watching a podcast/video about trading and the person seems overly excited and happy in their tone I immediately assume it's a grift and tune off.
best traders I've met are all jaded, talk really negatively about their profession and just want you to stay away.

assume people's advice here is just meant for you to be their exit liquidity. doubt and question everything, disregard it all. work your way up from that assumption.

pushed a lot of changes on my code today.
but now of 1000's of trades in an historical test, there's 2 trades not matching yesterday's.
meaning, something changed, but so small I am almost ignoring it. but I just can't. I won't leave desk until I know what that is.

old code refactoring is a nice thing opus 4.6 is helping me a lot with.
I had a behemoth of a code I built 1.5 years ago to manage my positions and it just one-shotted the whole thing in like 15 minutes.
still in beta test but all tests mirror exactly what my prior code did.

I am now more times facing the decision of shipping a new model, that I might not fully understand, but that seems reasonably good on an historical test, or to go back, spend 1-3 days going through the math and intuition to understand it.
I am the bottleneck, but I want it to be so. I think that's the feature of what we do and not the bug. I can't push something that will handle my own capital into prod, that I don't fully understand.
I am not talking here of a BS signal that people test and then call it a system... I am talking about full-fledged models, that seem to capture some behavioral