Because we have expectations, we want our partner to reach us to do what we want, and once the expectations are not met, we are disappointed. Under the domination of disappointment, at the beginning, you will make trouble, lose your temper, express your dissatisfaction, hoping to attract the attention of your other half, let him see your inner disappointment, and adjust his behavior; And the partner feels that he is being blamed, so he will not change. You will begin to command, to demand, to argue with him about right and wrong, to make him obey you and listen to you. You start fighting for power in your relationship, blaming each other and wanting each other to listen to you. When you do these things and find that he has not changed, you will have "hatred", and the two people will start to hurt each other, always quarrel, cold war, and the relationship will be worn out little by little. In the end, the two of you will enter a frozen state of relationship, completely disappointed in each other, no longer have expectations, and go to the last step before the divorce. A comfortable relationship that satisfies each other's needs can be extremely difficult in a marriage. The most fundamental reason is that love is a kind of ability, and most people do not have the ability to love. I don't know how to manage my marriage, I don't know how to adjust my behavior, and I don't know how to solve the contradictions and accumulated painful emotions of each other. Happiness is hard. It's harder than we expected, and it's beautiful, and it's the way we have to go. We don't need to rely on one person, but we always have to know and accept ourselves, and let ourselves have strength within ourselves. In our pursuit of happiness, what we gain is not just a good marriage, but to know ourselves in the conflict of the relationship, to transform ourselves in the repair of the relationship, to have inner strength, and to become a better version of ourselves.